Grass Valley

the beautiful bride

My lovely sisters from college

Mi Amor

Meagan & Austin celebrated their 1 year today

American River North Fork

My dear friend, sister in christ, and roommate from college got married this weekend to the love of her life, Stephen Miller.  If I could categorize Lauren and Stephen in two words it would be adventurous & down to earth.  Lauren & Stephen met our third year at Cal Poly and had an instant connection.  It has been a honor and joy to be apart of their relationship over the years and to have stood next to Lauren on her wedding day.  To give you a short snap shot of the wedding it was on a beautiful 50 acre property her family owns in Grass Valley where they have a vineyard and a 360 ariel view of the mountains and pine trees surrounding their area.  Breathtaking! But because it has been such an unusual month of May with rain and winds, Grass Valley brought some surprises yesterday.  It snowed, rained, and was extremely cold for an outdoor wedding in May:) but Lauren & Stephen being the people they are kept a smile on their faces the whole time.  After the storm eventually reached the property guests started taking shelter in the house and the outdoor wedding party turned into an indoor wedding party.  Have you ever seen a father daughter dance on a wood coffee table?  Or a living room transformed into a dance party with all of the furniture thrown outside? It was truly a celebration! 

I had a humbled moment when I looked out on the property to 150 empty white chairs, vases of flowers turned over and table linens sopping wet from the rain and thought, God does not care about any of these aesthetic details, He cares about people gathering together and loving one another! 

Family, compost, veggies, and Pismo

Veggie Beds in March 

Paine Plot Now 

gotta love the hill kids~ out at the farm! 

MaryLynn helping weed 

work in progress adjacent to the other plot

community farm (the hope:), anyone want to come out and hoe??? 

Sisters

This past weekend Michael and I had two honorary guests in our humble beach cottage in shell beach, Gerry Paine (aka mamma paine) and MaryLynn (aka aunt, gerry's sister).  Marylynn being from Canada had only a couple requests; the farmers market, Andreinni's, & Mexican food.  We enjoyed great conversations, gardening the new farm, a bond fire at our house, a historic walk in pismo beach, and of course you can't hang out with our aunt without doing a craft! There is nothing like quality time with family that makes you leaving feeling blessed, joyful, and refreshed.  Thanks for the company!! 

Self

"What she sees" by a 3rd grade girl today

The Mirror 

When you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you like what you see? Some days do you feel more attractive and beautiful than others?  Maybe its when you have lost a few pounds and have been working out more regularly.  Or maybe everyday you look in the mirror and you see yourself getting older and fatter.  Or maybe what they see, you don't see and have never seen.  And maybe, just maybe you are all like me and when you look in the mirror you see the reality of what the physical realm presents but not the reality of the spiritual realm.  I am talking about something deeper than what our eyes can behold.  Deeper than the number on the scale, or the size of your waist, or the wrinkles around your eyes, or the gray in your hair.  I am talking about the depth of our spirit that He sees every moment of every day.  And even now as I write this I am fighting against my flesh that say's "You are just not enough," every time I look in the mirror or see a reflection of myself or a picture, I only see what I believe and not the truth.  

And so what is the truth?

Romans 8:14 For all who are led by the Spirit of god are sons of God.  For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!"  The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God and if children, then heirs-heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. 

The Battle 

For me and I think for most christians, the battle does not lie in knowing the truth, the battle lies in Matthew 10:38 Whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.  Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. 

So, there is good news and bad news.  The good news is there is sonship with the Father! Heirs of Christ.  Sons & Daughters of the living God.  The bad news is in order to truly live, breathe, and move in this sonship we must die.  The thoughts of self, the reflection in the mirror, the comforts of materialism that say "I am worthy, I am beautiful, I am something."  Dying to myself, suffering, losing my life, these are all difficult truths for me to swallow.  And so I propose lets pray for this radical reality.  I need it but I am like Israel wanting to be in slavery, wanting to preserve myself.  Yet I want to be the man who found a treasure in a field and sold all he had to buy that field.  

The temporal cost is heavenly gain! 

 

Mission Accomplished

Feeling good at mile 6 

Approaching mile 9, paparazzi Michael on the move

Mile 10

My parents are on the left side cheering as I am running up towards them! 

Yah, the end! Michael was an informal runner that day:) 

My other fans, the Paines! 

I realized training and racing have a love hate relationship.  You see you train 99% longer than you do racing.  Racing is only 1% of the training and you better hope in however long that race takes it makes your training look dang good!  But the racing needs the training and the training needs the racing because that is when like I said, you get to shine:) Michael asked me the night before the race, "What is going to motivate you tomorrow?" That was easy, "thinking about all the hard work I have put forth for this day the past 10 weeks."  Of course I can think this out logically before the race but little did I know I would forget the past 10 weeks mentally but not physically and focus on every mile in front of me race day.  My goal for the half marathon was not only to complete the race but to finish @ 8:30 pace the whole time finishing in 1:50 minutes.  I am the type of person who needs the pressure in order to finish well, which I guess worked!

The night before the race Michael's parents came and stayed with my family so they could come and be cheerleaders.  The race started at 6:30am and Michael and I strolled in around 5:45am race day (yesterday) to a sea of 13,000 people.  Yes, 13,000 people ran the O.C half and full marathon that day!  I stretched, did my business (by the grace of God before the race), drank water, kissed my biggest fan Michael, and found my pace group.  The first 6 miles were great! The adrenal glands were pumping and I was feeling good.  But after about the 7th mile my relaxed state transformed into a very tense and uncomfortable state.  Most of the battle was thinking about maintaining my pace from the last mile, no where in sight were those motivational images of me running during training days, all I could think about was maintaining.  My little angel Michael found his way on the course periodically throughout the race completing a 10k that day:) He was my photographer  & very encouraging! I loved having my parents and in-laws there that day as well as I was looking forward to seeing them at mile 10.  Seeing the clock as I approached the finish line was glorious because I fought for my goal pace and time and achieved it! One of the things I have learned through this process is to never short change myself because I think I cannot do something.  And not just to do it, but to do it well.  I am already contemplating what my next race adventure will be...Lord willing:) 

O.C Half Marathon

I realized today I haven't wrote about the half marathon I will be doing this Sunday May 2nd, not sure why.  I think part of me does not want to come off as boasting as I know it is a big accomplishment for many people, including myself.  But I think instead of looking at it as an opportunity to boast it is truly an opportunity to give glory to the creator for allowing my body to achieve such a strenuous task. 

Two Sunday's ago I went on a long run before church in the morning.  I was at about mile 9 and had 2 more miles to go.  As I was running down Farrol St. in Arroyo Grande I saw a man in a wheel chair who had no legs.  We exchanged waves and I could not help but feel sorry for this man who would never experience what I was feeling in that moment again (unless the Lord restored his legs, may that be so).  Although it was a glory moment for me (a moment of praising God) for having legs.  Over the past ten weeks of training I have had many glory moments.  You see running does not come easily for me.  I have to mentally push myself to places I have never been before, mainly because I grew up dancing so running is like learning a foreign language.  A foreign language I am progressively growing stronger and more confident in. 

Please pray for rest, rejuvenation, and safety on my run Sunday!! 

 Some reasons I like to run...

• It is hard for me.  
• I get to see my body go to new levels it hasn't before
• It is always instantly rewarding after I reach the end of my run
• I feel empowered when I use reverse psychology to talk my body out of tired places
• I see progress weekly as I complete runs harder and longer 
• I get to just be! It is probably one of the only times in the day when I have no-one around me
• I listen to worship music blasting in my ears
• I get to smell the salty air or hints of eucalyptus
• I get to explore back country roads
• I get to be free from my mental check lists, worries, or agenda for the day
• It always gives me a reason to praise God for my health! 

Big Sur

Plaskett Creek Camp Site 

Our stove, we are quite the high rollers! 

Big Sur Coast at Sea Level

Big Sur Coast at 5, 148, the visibility was so clear we could see the Sierras 127 miles away

Cone Peak Trail, you can see where the fire came through

Redwoods 

My heart is sincerely overwhelmed at the wonder of HIS creation.  Michael and I are overwhelmingly thankful for this beautiful place in which we get to live and dwell this season of life.  We took a few days away from the business of life; work, school, house chores and other obligations to enjoy one another and our AWESOME God.   As usual we ended up on the Big Sur Coast camping for a few nights.  We had several encounters of Gods grace along the way as things usually don't go as planned.  We left almost two hours later than planned as we spent the morning visiting with a friend who was in town, Michael listening to some random man talk for half an hour in our front yard, and Michael once again being kind helping some British tourist use American gas pumps.  Like Heidi Baker says, "Stop for the one."  Our selfish driven culture is uncomfortable with this phrase, as myself live in this tension of wanting to love others yet wanting to mark another item off my check list.  But His little graces were among us: finding a campsite at 2:30pm over spring break, getting half off our campsite fee, free kindling and wood from our neighbor, and over $2o dollars of free wood from a family leaving, a beautiful warm day hiking over 5,000 feet in elevation 16 miles later with only a small blood filled scratch, a sleepy red wood trail with no one in sight, a cascading waterfall from the heavens, no mosquito bites and 3 perfect days in Big Sur.  We are so thankful! 

California Valley

Wild Flowers

my bouquet from Michael (we pressed the flowers and framed them) 

Poppies, baby blue eyes, gold fields, lupin, and yarro covered the hills in the California Valley this month in March.  This was our second annual motorcycle trip to see the wild flowers in season.  This is quite the spectator sport as people religiously will watch and wait for Gods little gifts of glory to pop! We ventured off into the afternoon cruising up hwy 101.  The air was warm.  And my mind was flooded with early memories on Night Hawk, my stomach always turning with butterflies as I held tight to this mysterious Michael Paine.  We packed a picnic lunch, our bibles, and a blanket that day.  I am always brought to remember how wonderfully good our God is when I look upon His creation.  He created the earth so man would dwell in it and enjoy it.  How good and loving is our Father to paint a world so beautiful.